Consider the following:

Source: https://www.jstor.org/stable/48714630; Is more always better?

This was a study conducted by the Harvard School of Health in 1995 on the psychology of human behavior. Back then the choices were between $50k vs $25k and $100k vs $200k – I adjusted it to inflation.

Participants essentially chose between a lower absolute quality in life versus a higher one – with the only difference being their relative financial standing/position in society.

Link to Full Survey Instrument and Research Paper

Study’s Findings

In the scenario of having more relative income vs more absolute income, the results concluded that 56% of respondents opted to live in a status quo where they had 50% less absolute income but higher relative income.

While this difference isn’t too significant, people cared more about having a higher relative status quo in attractiveness and intelligence.

  • Assuming physical attractiveness can be measured from 1 (lowest) to 10 (highest):
    • 75% picked having a physical attractiveness of 6; others average 4.
    • <25% picked having a physical attractiveness of 8; others average 10.
  • Assuming intelligence can be described by IQ on current tests:
    • 68% picked having an IQ of 110; others average 90
    • 32% picked having an IQ of 130; others average 150

The Human Condition

This study aimed to examine human traits such as altruism, envy, status, and competition.

Positional concerns about how much money, fame, and power others have plays heavily into how one perceives someone else‘s success. Viewing someone‘s accomplishment as your own failure leads to an attitude of constantly competing with others and a feeling of smugness or envy if perceptions of being “better” or “worse” than someone arises.

Those who elect to have relatively less as long as it’s mutually beneficial to all parties are altruistic – where their concerns lie either in a collective benefit or they are not concerned about their relative position in life.

Culture and Comparison

Coming from a cultural background where comparison was not just tolerated but actively encouraged, comparing myself to others was normal to me. My parents tell me of how in grade school everyone’s test scores and grades were posted publicly – full names and everything. It seems so natural that they would grow up comparing themselves to others.

This comparison, however, is toxic to everyone involved. The individual who is compared to someone they deem “better” feels insecurity, anxiety, stress, negative self-worth. The individual who prides themself in being “better” than others grows attached to this (often false) sense of security and sense of superiority.

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It’s important to treat ourselves with kindness upon realizing our tendencies to compare. Comparison was an evolutionary trait that actually benefitted our ancestors since resource competition was critical. However, we are no longer hunting and gathering. Today’s world is full of abundance and plenty, so this instinct becomes a fixation on materialistic comparisons which serves little purpose.

Having learned and grown so much in the past years have made me realize that it is so much better to protect your own peace and practice not just mindfulness but also gratitude.

I’m not here to lecture or diminish the value of ambition and the pursuit of success – these qualities are important in their own right. Rather, I’m advocating for balance where an emphasis is placed on self-fulfillment, inner peace, and gratitude.
It’s important to embrace and love yourself and appreciating the many privileges, gifts, and blessings that we’ve been graced with.